After readingthis post at Life and Times of an Indian Home Maker I was reminded of a similar conversation I had with my maid sometime back…
Now my child’s nanny M lives with us from Monday morning to Sunday morning… goes home to see her husband and mil on sunday morning and comes back on Monday… Before going into what happened… let me give u a brief background about her… She is all of 22 yrs old and has two daughters who are 9 and 6 yrs old… both of them live with her mother in her village in West Bengal… She got married when she was 12 and had her first girl when she was 13…. her elder was born in the starting of 8th month and was 1.2kgs only god knows how she survived as there were no incubators etc… Her general health is pretty bad… her husband has ran away twice with other females and come back after some 6 months and he continuously threatens her of marrying someone else and is good for nothing when it comes to work… he actuallys attempts to sell fish but he needs some 3 assistants for a small fish cart to cut fish etc and hence makes no money out it…..
Now when I think of all this I always used to wonder that why is M still living with him… why doesn’t she leave him and just move on after all then all the money that she gets from me she will have to finance her daughters eduction which she is very particular about atleast till now… and then I got her prespective one day when she didn’t turn up on Monday morning and I was wild on her as I had to take an off from office too….. this is what happened………
Monday morning about 9:30 am i am waiting for her and her husband calls up and says that M is not well and she will come to work late… pissed off I ask him what happened and why cant she talk and he replies he has come outside and the cell is with him and some stupid excuse like that…. I wait and wait and wait and finally she turns up at about 7pm in the evening… I was raging with anger and just burst on her that what happened and then she says I was not well and went to the hospital… I say ok and get on with work….
Couple of days later, she tells me didi u know that day why I didnt come… and she told me the whole story…
M: Mere pati ne mujhko baht maara
ME: shcoked… kyon?
M: usko paisa chahiye tha and maine kaha ki main didi ko kahke bank main jamma kar diya hai, do mahine baad bachi ki fees dene hain
ME: haan to kya bola woh
M: mujhe ek thapad maara usne and kaha ki jaake didi se paise leke aa
ME: maine mana kar diya tou mujhe bahut maara gardan and all pe nishan padh gayee and mujhe ghar se bahar nikaal diya
M: main 10 min tak wait kiya usse bulaya but woh bahut gandi gandi galli de raha tha tou maine soocha ki aapke yahan aa jaati hoon and wapas nahin jaaongi, phir main thodi door tak gayee the tou woh peche se aake mujhe bol ki apne aashik ke paas jaa rahi hai and mujhe baalon se khich ke wapas ghar le gaya… phir main behosh ho gayee and isliye kaam pe nahin aa saki
for 2 mins I couldnt speak at all then I composed myself and told her
ME: meera tou uski bekaar ki maar kyon sahti hai…. tu usko chod de and aapna chahe se paisa kama waise bhi voh tere ko kya deta hai… ya phir agar voh ek maare tou 2 maar
M: didi aise kaise chood doon… aur usse kuch bhi kahti hoon tou voh dhamki deta hai ki doosri shaadi kar lega…. mere sirf betiyan hain na and main operation bhi kar liya hai taaki aur bacha na ho…..
ME: acha kiya do bache se jyaada kaise sambhalegiand waise bhi agar usne doosri shaadi karni hai tou voh kar li lega… tu suse rook thode na sakti hai and kyon rookna chahti hai kyon maar khaati hai tou… kis kaam hai voh
M: didi main sirf apni betiyon ke liye maar khaati hoon… gaaon main agar yeh mujhe chood ke chala gaya tou meri ko log khaa jaayenge… woh na padh payengi and na hi kabhi shaadi hogi… meri aaj ki halat se bhi buri ho jaayegi…….. and duniya mujhe bhi kha jaayegi…..
After this I just couldnt say anything to her… I kept mum and since them I am thinking what can I do about it…I have asked her if she wants to bring her daughters here and I will put them in some school here but then i don t know how to work out the logistics…
After reading IHM’s post I realized that may be this is a common problem at that level and somehow we need to deal with it… but HOW AND WHEN????????
PS: for those who dont understand hindi too much please forgive me I couldnt have done this post in any other language… the translation would result in loosing a lot…..