My orkut fortune today says “Stop searching forever, happiness is just next to you”. It seems such a illusion looking at my current state of mind, from the past some time I have just been in depressed, irritated and itchy. I agree there is a happiness around me Ojas is there Naren is there but then why why I am feeling so low and itchy all the time.

One of the reasons that I can think of is that I am at home since ages, I am desperate to get back to work and have been trying hard to find a job since quite sometime now (3 weeks to be precise) but nothing has worked out till now and thats making me more depressed I am just not worth a job…

And then as I am at home 24×7 there is that saas bahu clashes, which both of us have been ignoring but somewhere they tend to irritate u in back of ur mind…

and then there are changing dynamics of my relationship with Naren, a new baby and the house is suddenly full of people my sister whos moved in to Bangalore and staying with us, his mom, his grandmom and a full time maid, we just dont seem to get anytime with each other.

I am just hoping that large part of my depression is just getting back to feeling monday blues and I will get better once I get back to work and ya hoping that I do get a job soon…..